Rihanna‘s 777 tour was a hot mess, but not as hot or as messy as the underwhelming documentary about the tour!

The highly-anticipated insider peek into tour life with our best bud Rihanna aired last night on FOX, and those who actually did see it didn’t seem to be super happy about it.  Rihanna 777 only averaged 1.73 million viewers and a 0.8 key demo rating, which is painfully low for such a huge doc!

So…why didn’t people watch? Was it the fact that the tour sucked? Or that we all hate Riri and Chris Brown together? Is everybody over Rihanna? I’m perplexed, but I cant’ say I’m not surprised. Her image has really been tarnished with her risque behavior (calling kids the “n” word, bailing on shows in favor of planning Chris Brown’s birthday, etc.), but I guess we’ll see to what extent as she keeps makin’ music!

Photo: FameFlynet

Chris Brown flirted with disaster yesterday!

The singer’s private jet was forced into an emergency landing yesterday at the Burbank International Airport after the cockpit filled with smoke after takeoff! Yikes.  TMZ confirms that Brown got on the jet in Burbank headed for the Met Gala, but roughly 7 to 8 minutes into the flight, everyone on board began to notice that the plane was much smokier than it should be!

One source told TMZ, “It was A LOT of smoke … everywhere.”

The pilot immediately turned the plane around and performed an emergency landing back in California. The passengers, of course, were freaked but the pilot was collected and handled the situation like a pro!

And hey, you hire a private jet, you should get a pro flying it!

Brown eventually made it to Teterboro, boarding another jet soon after the first touched down. He may have really wanted to make the Met Gala event, but missed it due to all this private jet switching. Fortunately for him, he made the after-party. And to Brown, that’s probably all that mattered. CHEERS!

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Now that the divorce is final between Tina and Joe Simpson, let’s let the ink dry and give them some space.

NOT!

I want to find out who got what, don’t you? And in fact, we can, seeing as these documents are now revealed to Radar online but enjoyed by all. Who gets the cars? Who is the beneficiary of Jessica Simpson‘s life insurance? Pressing questions revealed, after the jump!

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Yep.  For real. You heard right.

Chris Brown turns 24 on May 5th, but that’s ALSO the date Rihanna is expected for perform the Brooklyn leg of her Diamonds World Tour in NYC! So, what does any insanely doting- almost to the point of actual INSANITY-kinda on-again, off-again girlfriend do for her man when she’s an international pop star? Why, cancel the show, of course!

Right?

Insiders reveal that Riri was super appreciative of what he did for her birthday in February that she’s willing to work her schedule into overdrive to reciprocate the favor.

Sources explain (via PerezHilton):

“Chris treated her so bomb and surprised her with his presence when she turned 25, she wants to be with him badly when he turns 24. She’s not going to flat out ask him to be with her — not on his birthday because she feels that’s his day — but in her heart she wants him with her. It’s a surprise. All I can say is she’s got a few things up her sleeve. She wants Chris to know how much she loves him and wants him and honestly, she just wants to be with him and let him know she’s got his back.”

So…pretty much all he did was SURPRISE RIHANNA WITH HIS PRESENCE?!  Man, sounds like Rihanna is easily impressed and majorly diluded. And now she’s planning a whole thing and letting a show get all cancelled? Ugh, dis-gus-ting.

Photo: Fameflynet

Just in case you were wondering, Chris Brown and Rihanna do kinda finally seem to be THROUGH!

Why do I say this? Because Breezy was spotted partying with a very chic looking blonde lady.  So, that’s good for RiRi. Not so good for this new mystery girl, if I do say so myself. Says PerezHilton:

That’s right, following the reports that recently surfaced suggesting that America’s most volatile couple had finally thrown in the towel, Breezy was seen getting his pAArty on in a big way over the weekend in Hollywood…and holding hands with a blonde woman most certainly NOT the Barbadian superstar he famously beat senseless back in 2009!

In fact, sources at the nightclub allege that afterward, he even gave her a full bottle of champagne, before he and his entourage collected multiple other women and took off with them in two separate vehicles!

Chris Brown wastes no time.  Want to see a pic of his new hookup? Go HERE.  I’m kind of happy, because Chris Brown and Rihanna make me nauseous. Hopefully this new girl will wake up and realize that Chris Brown isn’t boyfriend material….

Photo: FameFlynet

Tina Simpson is concerned for her youngest daughter!

According to a source close to the fam, the Simpson matriarch is hoping sister Jessica Simpson can help stop the partying and the boozing that Ashlee Simpson seems to be into these days!  Not sure what she means (and when I say I’m not sure, I mean, I have no photographic evidence of Ashlee out and about on the town), but if there are some bad habits, it can’t be good for Ashlee’s kid, Bronx to be around that kind of behavior.

A source close to the family says:

“Tina’s asked Jessica to look out for Ashlee and make sure she doesn’t start partying too hard once again. With Jessica focusing on her second pregnancy, she’s a calming influence on Ashlee because she doesn’t want to go out on the town. Instead, she prefers family nights in relaxing and has encouraged Ashlee to join them when they are all together, which she has been doing.”

Aw, that’s nice!  But…are there buttered pop tarts involved in these “family nights?” (Sorry! I had to!)

Photo: FameFlynet

With negative tweeting and a Power 106 report that the two were done, we’re always guessing about the nature of Rihanna and Chris Brown‘s relationship!

And frankly, it’s TIRING.

The latest update is that Chris Brown was kickin’ it in South Beach this week when he made an unexpected appearance at Dream nightclub! Witnesses say the singer took the stage, sang a couple of his hits, flashed a few signature dance moves, and OF COURSE gave the crowd a peek at his rock hard abs (which I consider one of his signature moves).

Nothing to piss Rihanna off…yet. But, after the concert An eye-witness spotted Brown pulling multiple hot women into his V.I.P section and serving them Hennessy V.S cocktails, which isn’t exactly what you’d want YOUR boyfriend to be doing at a hot club in Miami, no?

I’m sure this drama is only the beginning. All I’m saying, RiRi, is to think about your relationship.  And when I say think about it, I mean END IT!

Photo: FameFlynet