Paula Abdul was so shaken by the apparent suicide of an obsessed fan outside her Los Angeles home three weeks ago that she hasn’t slept there since.

“I’ve been staying in different homes and hotels, and I have security with me,” she tells PEOPLE.

“It was very tragic and very upsetting to hear,” Abdul says of the death of Paula Goodspeed, a fan who auditioned for American Idol’s fifth season. “She had tried to do this before, and it was just heartbreaking … It was in the middle of Hollywood week, and it happened while I was actually working at the Kodak Theatre, and it was devastating to hear.”

While producers were informed shortly after police discovered Goodspeed’s body, no one let Abdul know until after they had finished taping Idol for the day. “It wasn’t fun,” Abdul says.

The tragedy came in the middle of an extremely busy time for Abdul, who, besides working on the new Idol season, recently taped a new MTV cheerleading squad competition special, Rah!, (which airs in January) and has been preparing to launch her Forever Your Girl accessories line on HSN Monday night.

Yet work, she says, “gives me diversion. I always feel like if I can divert my brain to something else then I’ll be okay. That’s why I like to multitask.”

She is also thankful to others for their help during the ordeal. “I have my family, and I have my good friends who’ve completely opened their hearts and their doors to me, which is great.”

Abdul says she is now preparing to put her house on the market: “I am in the process of looking for another place to reside.”

Reagrding details of Goodspeed’s obsession, Abdul has been told not to talk about it, given the ongoing police investigation. “I’d love to tell you so much more,” she says, “but I’m holding my tongue.”

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VIDEO ABOVE IS PAULA GOODSPEED ON SEASON 5 OF AMERICAN IDOL.  So sad.

A car with a dead woman inside found parked outside Paula Abdul’s house in Los Angeles on Tuesday night is registered to Paula Goodspeed, a former American Idol contestant and self-described “really big fan” of Abdul.

Police have not confirmed the identity of the woman – an apparent suicide victim – but suggested she was an infatuated fan of Abdul.

The woman’s car featured a license plate “ABL LV” and had a photo of Abdul hanging from the rear view mirror, according to Fox News video taken at the scene. A DMV check of the license showed that the car was registered to Goodspeed, 30.

“This has been ruled an apparent suicide,” said LAPD officer April Harding, “and the coroner’s office is now investigating. The body was found around 6 p.m. Tuesday.”

Abdul was at the studio at the time the body was found and wasn’t aware of it until she was told by the network, her rep says.

Abdul Expresses Shock

“I am deeply shocked and saddened at what transpired yesterday,” Abdul said in a statement. “My heart and prayers go out to her family.”

Los Angeles station KTLA quoted police Capt. Jim Miller as saying the woman had an infatuation with the American Idol judge.

Goodspeed’s Idol audition was prominently featured by the show, and in her interview with host Ryan Seacrest, she clearly expressed her affection for Abdul.

“I really like Paula Abdul a lot. She’s really cool,” said Goodspeed when asked about her inspiration during the Idol audition process. “I’m a really big fan, and I made life-sized drawings of Paula. I’ve been drawing ever since I was a little kid, and my first drawing was of Paula Abdul.”

Goodspeed Panned by Judges

But after singing her rendition of Tina Turner’s “Proud Mary,” the woman was roundly panned by the show’s judges.

“It was terrible, what was that?” said Randy Jackson. In addition, Simon Cowell made disparaging remarks about her braces: “I don’t know how you can sing with all that metal in your mouth.”

Abdul, who lit up when Goodspeed said her name was Paula, said, “Speechless, don’t know what to say” after hearing the song.

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A body was found in a car a few houses down from Paula Abdul’s home, and there are reports the victim was a “big fan” of the “Idol” judge.

The body was discovered last night in a car. Cops tell us it may have been a drug overdose/suicide.

Here’s what’s strange. LAPD got a call from the Ventura County Sheriff’s Dept. last night, saying a female body may be in a car on the street in question. It’s unclear how Ventura County deputies knew a body inside a car was miles away from its jurisdiction.

An LAPD spokesperson said the parents of the victim believe their daughter was a “big fan” of Paula’s. Whether this has anything to do with the victim’s death is unclear, but it seems more than a coincidence her body was found just yards from Paula’s home.

There’s no evidence of foul play. The victim has not yet been ID’d. We’re told Paula was not home and possibly shooting for “American Idol.”

LATER UPDATED STORY:

Dead Woman at Paula’s House — Suspected Stalker

The woman whose body was found outside Paula Abdul’s home last night may have been stalking the “A.I.” judge.

Police sources tell us they think the victim is an alleged Abdul stalker and cops have been to the house “numerous times before” to deal with her.

Paula’s people tell us they know who the woman is.

The victim was found dead in a car, yards from Paula’s L.A. home. Cause of death may have been a drug overdose.

UPDATE: The Ventura County Sheriff’s Department tells TMZ the victims parents called them at 3:00 PM to tell them their daughter was missing and that she “had an unnatural obsession” with Paula Abdul and they might want to check Abdul’s home.

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Yesterday, the Internet was buzzing that Paula Abdul didn’t approve of American Idol’s decision to hire a fourth judge, songwriter Kara DioGuardi.

But judging from the A.I. queen’s conversation with Ryan Seacrest on his KIIS-FM show today, it seems as though Paula couldn’t be more thrilled to have her pal Kara—whose career she claims to have launched—join her, Simon and Randy at the judges’ table.

Paula tells Ryan she met Kara outside a restaurant in New York when Kara was a Billboard magazine employee with songwriting dreams. After meeting her that day, Paula convinced Idol’s newbie judge to drop everything and move to L.A. with her.

Says Paula: “[Kara] was my roommate! And I took her all around the world with me and introduced her to wonderful people…She stayed in Sweden and wrote with these people and got started living her dream.”

Not only does Paula sound enthusiastic about Kara in general, but when Ryan asked her where Kara will sit at the judges’ table, Paula said, “I dunno. Hopefully next to me.” But in case that proves distracting, Paula continues, “we’ll probably be separated by Simon or something.”

When in doubt, always blame the British guy.

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WENN

Paula Abdul has undergone surgery on her neck to relieve pain she has suffered for the past 20 years.

According to reports, the American Idol judge checked into Los Angeles’ Olympia Medical Center in early August for a five-day stay.

The 46-year-old singer’s spine was first damaged during a cheerleading accident when she was 17. She was then involved in a car accident and a minor plane crash that worsened the damage.

She once told reporters, “I have four titanium plates in my neck. I’ve had 14 surgeries over the years.”

A source tells the National Enquirer of her recent surgery, “Paula wasn’t about to begin another season of Idol living in constant pain. Auditions for the show begin in New York at the end of August, and she wanted to make sure she was feeling her best before hitting the road.”

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WENN

Paula Abdul has sparked rumors of a reunion with ex-boyfriend J.T. Torregiani.

Abdul, 46, split from the 33-year-old restaurateur in May, blaming the break-up on their hectic work schedules.

But the pair was spotted going to the cinema together in Sherman Oaks, California last week, prompting speculation they have rekindled their romance.

A source close to the American Idol judge tells People.com, “They’re taking it slow, testing the waters. They’ve gone on a few friendly dates.”

The insider adds Torregiani “wants to date her again. JT thinks she’s a sweetheart. They have good chemistry.”

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WENN

Paula Abdul has split from her restaurateur boyfriend J.T. Torregiani.

The 46-year-old began dating Torregiani – who is 12 years her junior – last July, and the couple moved in together soon afterwards.

But Abdul’s representative, Jeffery Ballard, has confirmed to E! that they are no longer together – and haven’t been for some time.
He says, “They broke up months ago.”

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WENN