HA! Spencer Pratt took to his Twitter yesterday and posted the following Tweet:

This is the day my earth dad wishes he had worn a condom. No joke.

Spencer is currently estranged from his family. He “felt his parents would talk to him only about Stephanie and that they charged him with taking care of her. He thinks she’s a loser and doesn’t want anything to do with her” according to Us Weekly.

“They noticed him changing two years ago and stayed by his side. But now it’s too much,” the source added. “They even took the pictures of him out of their home.”

Spencer married Heidi Montag in April of 2009, but the two have been separated since June 8th. Heidi split and headed for Malibu where she is to begin filming her own reality show about being single.

Sources still insist the fake is split in a desperate attempt to remain famous. “Heidi and Spencer are laughing over it and having a blast,” the insider said. (Indeed, even Spencer Twittered that he was at “the beach house in Malibu” on Saturday.)

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UPDATE: Well, TMZ is reporting that the split looks to be legit! Apparently Heidi has lawyer’d up, and is looking to divorce Spencer… and QUICKLY.

We’ve learned Heidi has picked Jodeane Farrell to handle her divorce and this lawyer isn’t playing games … she’s already taking steps to get the quickest divorce possible in California.

Farrell — who has practiced family law for 24 years and currently handles divorce mediations — will be setting up a meeting with Heidi and Spencer in approximately two weeks. We’re told both Heidi and Spencer want the divorce mediated — meaning the two will try and hash out a property settlement privately, wait the six months required by California law, and end their marriage.

Heidi wants Farrell to be the mediator, provided Spencer is down with it. Farrell is a longtime friend of the Montag family, but she tells TMZ she doesn’t think there will be a problem in mediating the deal.

Farrell plans to meet with Heidi and Spencer together, and if he’s on board she’ll schedule a meeting with their accountant to go over assets and liabilities.

And Farrell says … so far things are “very amicable” between Heidi and Spencer.

TMZ

My how things have changed! The couple went from absolutely inseparable to mudslinging in a matter of months. According to Radaronline.com, the couple are now accusing each other of having affairs. Heidi is so sure, she has hired a private detective to spy on Spencer!

As RadarOnline.com exclusively revealed, Heidi is staying at the Malibu home of Cougar Zank, a Marine turned bodyguard and bit actor who had become close friends with Spencer.

As RadarOnline.com exclusively revealed, Heidi is staying at the Malibu home of Cougar Zank, a Marine turned bodyguard and bit actor who had become close friends with Spencer.

Earlier this year, Pratt moved Zank into the Pacific Palisades home he and Heidi were renting, with Spencer claiming the two men were working on a new script together.

But when Heidi and Spencer split a month ago, Zank invited Heidi to stay with him at a home he rents in Malibu.

That made Spencer’s hair stand on end.

He considered Cougar HIS friend, and he’s convinced himself the only reason Cougar would have sided with Heidi in the split is that “he wanted her for himself,” a well-placed source tells RadarOnline.com.

The source revealed that Heidi is just back from New York City and that Cougar accompanied her on the trip.

“They are definitely friends, and I don’t know if there is anything more to it than that, but Spencer believes there is. He’s certain there is.”

Read the rest at RadarOnline…

What a mess!

After announcing a separation, Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt may not have each other anymore — and to make matters worse, they may not have any money, either! “They are completely broke,” an insider tells In Touch, noting that their dwindling popularity is to blame.

“Their income has dropped — but their spending habits have not,” explains the insider.

And they buy things for no reason whatsoever. “Heidi has never met a designer bag that she didn’t have to have,” says a source. “And Spencer spends all of his money on gadgets, including professional night vision equipment and telescopes.”

Because of their irresponsible spending habits, Spencer, who made about $65,000 per episode on The Hills, and Heidi, who raked in a cool $100,000 per episode, are now reportedly living on credit until they find new ways to make money. So how did Heidi and Spencer squander a fortune?

$2 Million On Heidi’s Music

“Within the first week, we will definitely make our money back,” said Heidi. Sadly, they didn’t.

$30,000 To Her Family

Heidi’s pal Paul “Cougar” Zank says she helped her mom pay her mortgage so she didn’t lose her house.

$500,000 On Crystals

Spencer admits his obsession with crystals left him with $203 in his bank account.

$500,000 On Cars

Over the years, Spencer and Heidi have bought a Porsche, a Rolls-Royce and a vintage Camaro.

$400,000 On Protection

Aside from the guns he bought, Spencer hired ex- Marines to be bodyguards for the couple.

What I want to know is how much money Heidi spent on that new robot body of hers. All that work could not have come cheap!!

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So is this split for real, or what!? While I’m totally getting sick and tired of all the drama, I secretly love it… a bit. You know you do too, don’t lie!

Ah, this picture was taken back before both of them lost their ever-lovin minds.

Heidi Montag filed for legal separation from husband Spencer Pratt in a Santa Monica, Calif. courthouse on Tuesday, a court clerk confirmed to UsMagazine.com.

Montag, 24, did not file for divorce; a legal separation means that Heidi’s earnings will become hers alone from the date of separation.

But is Montag’s court appearance — a week after her rep confirmed a split to Us — just another publicity stunt?

“This breakup is the latest part of Spencer’s master plan,” an insider recently told Us Weekly, explaining that the couple is in panic mode now that The Hills is winding down. Another source adds that duo is “laughing over” the breakup headlines “and having a blast.”

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Heidi and Spencer Pratt fabricated their split in a desperate attempt to stay famous as The Hills wraps up, the new issue of Us Weekly reports.

While Heidi’s rep confirms the breakup to Us (“Heidi… hopes people respect her privacy”), sources say any estrangement is about as real as Heidi’s size-F breasts.

Adds another insider of the couple, who wed in April 2009, “Heidi and Spencer are laughing over it and having a blast.”

Even Heidi’s big sis, Holly, 26, twittered the couple are “liars.”

Pal Jen Bunney – who left the second season of The Hills after feuding with Lauren Conrad over Brody Jenner – says she and Heidi, 23, are shopping a single-girls reality show.

“They were waiting for The Hills to be over to split. Now she doesn’t have to pretend,” Bunney tells Us of the duo, who originally rejected a fake divorce plot-line on The Hills.

The two are in publicity-seeking panic mode. “This breakup is the latest part of Spencer’s master plan,” another insider says.

So could they get back together?

“There are no plans for divorce,” says a source close to the couple, and Heidi’s rep confirms no papers have been filed.

And Bunney hints a reunion could happen on their show.

“That will be a big aspect of our show: How Spencer handles it,” she tells Us.

More from US Weekly!

Look how normal they look! This is before Heidi became Frakenstein, and Spencer lost his mind. Ahhh, the good ol’ days.

According to sources, Spencer Pratt has moved out of the home he shares with wife, Heidi Montag in Pacific Palisades, CA. Spencer’s “crazy behavior” drove Heidi over the edge. In the last several month, Heidi feels that Spencer’s behavior has cost her all of her friends, and alienated her from her family.

Spencer’s family and friends began to fear that he had lost his mind. He was spending hundreds of thousands of dollars on crystals, and apparently had been holding Heidi hostage in her own home. It’s no wonder she left him!

But it’s hard to say – with the two of them – if this is for real, or if this is yet another publicity stunt.

While RadarOnline’s sources claim the split is legit, TMZ is thinking this split has something to do with the upcoming reality show that Heidi will soon be filming in Malibu. TMZ claims that while they have split, Heidi’s not interested in filing for divorce… just yet.

Heidi will be staying with friend Jennifer Bunney while she films her reality show this summer. Some think she’s not going to file for divorce until The Hills has finished filming, but that seems unlikely to me. If she were going to file for divorce, something tells me she’d do it in front of a camera.

Ok, I was done posting for the day – on my way to enjoying my lovely holiday and I saw this news flash on Twitter. Oh please let this be true! The boy is straight up crazy!

Heidi Montag has separated from husband Spencer Pratt, TMZ has learned.

Heidi’s rep tells TMZ, “Heidi is looking to move out due to all the fake bad press that Spencer controls. She’s tired of it and is looking for a place and wants to focus on her acting career.”

We’re told Heidi — pictured here in Malibu last Friday — is looking for a new place to live … in Malibu.

As TMZ first reported, Heidi and Spencer called the police on Heidi’s mom a few weeks back … so there’s been plenty of turmoil.

A source close to Heidi and Spencer tells TMZ the tension in the relationship has been building for a while now … “It wasn’t just a sudden thing.”

Now it makes sense … On Tuesday, Heidi tweeted, “I am not Heidi Pratt, I am Heidi Montag.”

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