In 2012, 90210 and Dallas actress AnnaLynne McCord revealed that she had been the victim of sexual assault, but didn’t provide any details about the attack. However, she recently penned an essay for Cosmopolitan about the incident because she’s “done staying quiet.” McCord explains that she grew up in a very religious and conservative family.
There was intense corporal punishment:
My parents believed in strict “discipline,” as they called it — I would call it abuse. The punishments were painful and ritualistic. We would have to bend over the bed, sometimes with our pants down, arms outstretched, and get spanked — with a ruler in our younger years and later with a paddle that my parents bought when they thought the ruler wasn’t strong enough.
Later, while her parents were going through a divorce, she moved to Miami and started modeling.
On my own for the first time, I was meeting lots of hot boys. I had all these crazy, intense sexual feelings — the energy and desire a guy would have for me was enthralling. I became sort of promiscuous but didn’t actually have sex. I’d get right there with the guy and then stop, thinking I’d go to hell. Then I’d go to church to cleanse myself. At the same time, I pushed men to be violent toward me. After all, as I had learned in my childhood, people who loved me hurt me.
She was sexually assaulted when she was 18 by a guy friend:
When I was 18, I moved to Los Angeles to audition for roles. My boyfriend planned to come later. One night, a guy friend called. He said he needed a good night’s sleep for a meeting, as he’d been crashing on someone’s couch. I had known him for some time, so I said to come over and I set him up with a clean towel. We sat on the bed and talked for a while, then I fell asleep. When I woke up, he was inside me.
At first, I felt so disoriented and numb, I closed my eyes and pretended to be asleep. I wondered if I had done something to give him the wrong idea. I felt afraid of making him angry. Believe it or not, I didn’t want to offend him. I just wanted it to be over. My childhood had come back to haunt me again: Because of the physical abuse, I didn’t believe there were borders between other people’s bodies and my own. I didn’t believe I had a voice.
Her final message in the essay is empowering:
Most of all, I have my message for women and girls: You have a voice. Don’t put yourself in a box. Don’t let the polite lies of society silence you. Honestly, I would endure everything all over again — it has led me to my own revolution.
You can read the whole essay here. What a difficult thing to go through. But how amazing that she was able to turn around such a devastating experience and use it to empower not only herself, but to share her story in hopes that she can help others.
Photos: FameFlynet, Source
Posted Tuesday, June 3rd, 2014 at 10:10am
Filed under AnnaLynne McCord