Man, going to prison is like, the best thing that ever happened to Real Housewives star Teresa Giudice…it’s the weirdo gift that keeps on giving!
Her new book drops today, and yeah, we’ll get to that. But first, we gotta talk prison FOOD. After a year long stint in the boom boom room, Teresa has a mouthful of words to say about the place’s culinary wiles, and it’s especially hilarious because she’s trying to eat “clean” and “consciously” while having a starring role in the Orange Is The New Black episode that is her life.
“Everything was expired. In the summer it got around that someone saw maggots in the rice, and that blew around the camp quick,” she tells PEOPLE exclusively in this week’s isssue. “I was grossed-out and never wanted to eat rice again but at the same time I was starting to cut out the carbs so it kind of worked anyway.”
I guess being on a health kick while in the klink isn’t the easiest…? Shocker.
“We did have salad, but, oh my God, it was beans and rice all the time,” she tells PEOPLE. “I mean, you know, listen: The inmates were the cooks and they did the best they could, but you know, it wasn’t the best quality of food. It wasn’t.”
Also, REAL TALK? She got mad constipated.
“I had like a lot of stomach problems there. I couldn’t go to the bathroom Ã¢â¬Â¦ I was, like, dying. I was like, ‘My stomach is killing me,’ ” she reveals. “I started not eating so much of the meat because I would get sick. The meat I didn’t eat because I knew it was definitely expired.”
A fate worse than death! Still, expired meat??? Is that what my tax dollars are going towards? Shame, US prison system. SHAME!