Justin Theroux lands the cover of GQ Magazine, says Jennifer Aniston won’t let him keep his STD art.
Justin Theroux lands the October of GQ, and doesn’t he look thrilled? Every time I see pictures of him I think he just looks annoyed…all the time. Like he’s doing all of us a favor, for taking time out of his busy schedule to pose for us. Maybe I think this because I’m not terribly a huge fan of his. I don’t like his movies, and I don’t think he’s hot.
According to The Hollywood Reporter, he’s returning to TV. HBO has just picked up his pilot called ‘The Leftovers.’ He plays a sheriff during the Apocalypse. He’s not promoting that in the article, because at the time it hadn’t been picked up yet. Instead he talks about his fiance, Jennifer Aniston, having ADHD, hating flipflops and more.
Justin says that Jennifer Aniston changed his life: “It’s a bit like going to a slightly different altitude, you know?” he says. The paparazzi—“I call them photojournalists, actually,” he says—can be a drag. And “when I get complimented on the street because I’m having twins”—that’s weird, too.
On what Jennifer won’t let him move to their new house: “I have these beautiful wax-museum pieces—handmade, from the 1800s—from a museum of curiosities. They’re just these open mouths, with tongues, and in the throats are different stages, labeled, of syphilis and gonorrhea and whatever.” He pauses in a way that makes clear his betrothed drew the line at gonorrhea. “Those definitely found a great place in my office in L.A.,” Theroux says. “They weren’t going to be above the fireplace anytime soon.”
Jen loves that he’s non-athletic: “That’s one of the things Jen loves about me.”
The house they just bought came with six chickens! “We inherited the chickens from the previous owners,” Theroux says. “They were like, ‘Of course we’ll get rid of the chickens,’ and we said, ‘Are you crazy? Don’t get rid of the chickens. That’s half the reason we wanted this place.’ ”
He hates flip flops:“There’s these guys you see just walking through SoHo with big mops of hair, wearing flannel pants and flip–flops on their way to Montauk. And you think, ‘Who the hell are you? What do you do?’ F–king surfboard on the top of the Range Rover. I have a real issue with the makers of Tevas. Not only should there never be Velcro on any shoe; there should not be Velcro and neoprene on a shoe. Then there definitely should not be Velcro, neoprene, and some sort of beaded Indian print. I know: They’re comfortable. Lots of things are comfortable. I could put my feet in kneaded dough and walk down the street. That’s comfortable, but I’m not going to do it, you know? Ridiculous.”
MORE AFTER THE JUMP!
On having ADHD while growing up: “That’s still my least favorite thing to hear,” Theroux says. “Someone saying, ‘Don’t be stupid.’ ” Diagnosed with ADHD, he had the habit of making trouble and ran through a bunch of schools when he was younger. “I could not keep my mind on one task,” he says. When he tried, “it was like trying to bite down on a tennis ball”—by which he means, impossible. “You go, ‘Okay, I’m going to try.’ Then the toe starts tapping, your hand moves, next thing you know you’re grabbing a pencil, breaking it, and throwing it.” Worse still, Theroux couldn’t read. He didn’t finish a book, beginning to end, until he was in high school. “Reading was tough,” he says. “Like, insurmountable.”
Ben Stiller on Justin Theroux: “That ‘Never go full retard’ speech [in Tropic Thunder] is a great example of Justin’s genius,” says Ben Stiller, his co-writer and friend of twenty years. “It just, like, flowed out of him. When we’re writing, he’ll get an idea and just kind of go off.”
He’s addicted to Nicorette gum: “I’ve been on it five years, I have zero desire to smoke, and I don’t want to tear my flesh off. I wish I owned stock in Nicorette. I love Nicorette. Best invention ever.” He pops it constantly during our time together, and at one point goes off, as Stiller says he’s wont to do, on a flight of fancy about becoming a Nicorette pitchman: “Don’t you think it would be great to do a bunch of Nicorette commercials? Just, like, me in the desert, kind of Marlboro Man–style, driving a fast car, pulling over, looking at the sunset. Dissolving in ecstasy. Can’t you see it? Me blowing huge Nicorette bubbles. ‘I love it with coffee, with cocktails.’ Or, ‘It goes perfect with anything—sadness, despair.’ ”
I wonder if Justin and Jennifer actually WILL get married. I hope they do – I do think they make a good couple.