Dylan McDermott and his wife of nearly 12 years, actress Shiva Rose, have separated, his rep tells PEOPLE.

McDermott, 45, and Rose, 38, have been married since 1995 and have two daughters, 11-year-old Collette and 2-year-old Charlotte.

In a 2001 interview with Diane Sawyer, McDermott says he saw Shiva in a coffee shop and was instantly smitten. “I was in love with her right away,” he said. “For her, it was a little longer, you know, a couple of years. But for me, it was right away. I guess it was grace.”