Sadly, due to time constraints, the Golden Globe Awards ended prematurely last night before the last category was announced. We speak, of course, of the Most Awkward Golden Globe for which there were five worthy contenders:

· Ben Stiller, who introduced the film Borat with the unfunny joke, “You will laugh, you will cry, you will see a man hold a bag of his own poop – and, no, I’m not talking about Rocky Balboa.”

· Meryl Streep, who stopped to talk to Jack Nicholson‘s daughter, Lorraine, on her way to the retrieve the award for best performance by an actress in a comedy and started her acceptance speech, “I told Lorraine she came to a birthday party at my house in Beverly Hills with snakes. We had snakes! But then we moved back east.”

· Helen Mirren’s breasts. There’s just something weird about seeing cleavage on a gray-haired woman. That’s just the way it is.

· Annette Bening’s forced smile during all the “Your husband has had sex with everyone” jokes.

· Arnold Schwarzenegger, who ended the evening in character as the Terminator saying, “Don’t forget next year. We’ll be back!” He should have at least opted for the “I’m the pawty poopah” bit from Kindergarten Cop.

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